I got married in the mid 90’s. I was completely clueless as to how to plan a wedding but somehow I managed to throw something together in time and in February of 96’ I said I do.
Looking back I’ll tell you some of the things I didn’t do and in the end didn’t matter.
- I didn’t get a wedding coordinator.
- I didn’t make any centerpieces for the tables.
- I didn’t rent table clothes for the tables
- I didn’t make any kind of decorations for the venue.
- I didn’t have any parting gifts for the guests.
- I didn’t buy a dress, (I rented it.)
- I didn’t have a flower girl or a ring bearer.
- I didn’t have any cute signs telling you wear to go.
But you know what? We’ve been happily married for 18 years. And I can guarantee you that if you ask anyone from that day what we had for dinner, they probably couldn’t even tell you. My hope is that they can look back and remember how much we loved each other.
Fast forward to today and the world of Pinterest. Before you think I’m bashing Pinterest I want you to know that I love Pinterest. I have many many boards on Pinterest but here’s the kind of pressure Pinterest puts on those planning a wedding these days.
- Must have table linens. Matching your colors preferably.
- Must have cute chair decorations on backs of chairs and covers if ugly.
- Must have centerpieces that go with your over all theme. Because weddings now have themes.
- Having a wedding coordinator is a must.
- Decorating your venue with sparkly lights and pretty fabrics set the stage for the night.
- Real flowers vs. fake flowers. The debate is still on going.
- Make sure you have a little something for every one of your guests when they leave the reception.
That’s just few things I could think of off the top of my head. But here’s my question? Who’s supposed to pay for all this stuff? Even when you DIY it gets expensive. Would we like to be able to provide those fun, extra things? Sure we would, but it can’t happen, at least not now.
So having a daughter that’s planning a wedding and a husband who may be facing another lay off makes it very difficult to face those who think we should have had all this money saved for this joyous occasion.
We’ve been a one income family since getting married 18 years ago. With rising taxes and insurance and car troubles and house repairs etc. there just wasn’t any way we could save enough money to meet the expectations that Pinterest has put on us parents. *Just so you know, my daughter doesn’t expect all those things and she completely understands our predicament.*
I know that we are going to make this work one way or another. I just hope that when it’s all said and done, no one remembers that the plates were plastic or the napkins were paper. My hope is that they remember a joyous union between two young people in love.