Getting Old Still Stinks!

Eight years ago I wrote this humorous post about getting old. If you want a good chuckle go check it out. Little did I know when I wrote that post what I’d be dealing with eight years later.

I’d like to share my thoughts in a little poem I call:

Hormones

My feelings aren’t my own these days.

The hormones want to come and play.

I’m happy, mad, crazy, weepy.

My hubby thinks it’s kinda creepy.

My monthly friend is more sporadic.

More like a curse that’s wreaking havoc.

My hips are wide, my skin is thin.

I’m growing a beard on my chin.

My mind is scattered, can’t complete a thought.

Remembering things takes everything I’ve got.

One moment I’m hot and then I’m cold.

A constant reminder I’m getting old.

The End.

I’m really not that bad on a day to day basis but some days feel very much like this. LOL! Hope it at least gave you a good laugh. Because laughter really is the best medicine.

How are you becoming the best version of YOU?

HUGS!
Kim

Beauty and the Beast! The Breakup!

If anyone could come up with a legitimate reason to write another post about their washer and dryer, it would be me. And so I did.

But first you really need to read the first two posts. They aren’t long and won’t waste too much of your life, I promise. I’ll even wait till you get back, cause I’m good like that. So go forth and read. 

Here’s Part 1: Beauty and the Beast

And Part 2: Beauty and the Beast –2 Years Later.

See? I waited. You’re welcome.

Now that you’re caught up to speed I thought I might as well tell you that there was a sad and horrible breakup a week ago between the two lovebirds.

Apparently, Ms. Sweetie Pie decided that she was tired of doing our laundry. She didn’t enjoy the spinning and swishing any more. So Ms. Sweetie Pie got a first class ticket to where ever not so old but spoiled and lazy washers go. Washer rehabilitation? Washers Anonymous? Where ever she went, she’s gone baby!

Mr. Die Hard was a little sad and lonely at first but I honestly think he was a little tired of the complaining and nagging that had been going on. (Pay no attention to the broken tile. That’s another story for another time. )

But don’t worry. It wasn’t long before Mr. Die Hard had a new friend.

Meet Twinkles. Twinkles got her name because she makes all sorts of twinkle sounds and has twinkly lights. She’s quite soothing to listen to. Say hi Twinkles. Twinkles says Hi.

So far they’ve gotten along quite nicely. She does her job, he does his. There’s no awkward tension. It’s quite nice.

Oh and here’s a little fun fact for you. I talked to my mom and apparently our dryer is over 35 years old.

This post was brought to you by someone who feels the need to name their appliances and give them personalities. You’re welcome.

What’s your oldest appliance to date?

Have a lovely day my friends.

Kim

Because You Need a Little Laughter!

We interrupt my bathroom remodel posts to bring you a little laughter. Those of you who have been visiting my blog for more than 4 years know I used to host a Friday Funnies Meme. It started to dwindle out as Facebook became more popular. But I loved it while it lasted.

Anyhoo, I came across this funny yesterday and thought I would share it with you all to brighten your day.

Enjoy!

1. My Goal for 2016 was to lose 10lbs. Only 15 more to go.

2. Ate salad for dinner! Mostly tomatoes and croutons. Really  just one big round crouton covered in tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE! It was pizza. I ate a pizza!

3. How to prepare tofu: A. Throw it in the trash. B. Grill some meat.

4. I just did a weeks worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

5. I don’t mean to brad but I finished my 14 day diet in exactly 3 hours and 20 minutes.

6. A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live long than the men who mention it.

7. Kids today don’t know how easy they have it. When I was young I had to walk 9 feet in shag carpet just to turn the TV channel.

8. I may not be that funny, or athletic, or good looking, or smart or talented…….wait, where was I going with this?

9. I love being over 40 I learn something new every day ……and forget 5 others.

10. I think I’ll just put an “Out of Order” sticker on my forehead and call it a day.

11. Senility has been a smooth transition for me.

Okay so be honest. How many can you relate to?

Have a lovely day friends.

Kim

A Funny Story (Scripture Gone Wrong)

I thought we could all use a funny story. Cause I like funny. My life is funny. I’m a sitcom waiting to happen. At least in my mind.

Anyhoo, the other morning my 10 year old son came out and gave all of us a little scripture book that he had been making. (Not sure where my other son’s is.)

It totally melted this momma’s heart. As I was reading through each verse my heart just kept getting bigger and bigger. We are raising this kid right man.

For instance, this one is totally me. Like, totally.

And then just as I was turning to the next page he goes on to tell us that he picked out each verse for us individually. Which made it even more special.

Until I read the next verse.

Oh. My. Goodness! I laughed so hard, I cried. Come to find out I hadn’t taught him what sluggard meant and so he thought it was a good thing. Ha! Ha! Ha! (And just so you know, I am an early riser. LOL!)

I hope you got a chuckle out of my story. Stay tuned for more crazy.

HUGS!

Kim

Because Life is Too Short Not to Use My Fiesta Ware!

I’m sure by the end of this post you are either going to completely relate to what I’m going through or you’re going to call someone in to intervene. I’m good with either. *smile*

Let me start off by saying, I know I have a problem. So admitting my problem is the first step in getting help right? Sure it is.

Can I back story for a sec? Thanks. You see back in our old house, back when ivy was really in, I decorated my kitchen in ivy and had ivy pot holders, an ivy tea kettle, containers and dishes. I LOVED the ivy dish set that my mom got me. It was huge and had everything from bowls to plates to cups to serving plates and serving bowls. I mean it was a nice set.

Somewhere in the middle of all that I fell in love with Fiesta Ware. My hubby blessed me with 4 sets that next Christmas and I quickly washed it and put it in my hutch. And then never ever used it. My excuse? Well there was 5 of us in the family so it just didn’t make sense for 4 of us to use it and then one of us not too. So years went by with it sitting in my hutch undisturbed.

We then moved off the beach and into our new home. My kitchen theme drastically changed from an ivy theme, to a coffee theme to my new retro, 50’s style theme. With that I figured I needed new plates. Red and white plates. Because red and white runs through my veins. So my wonderful hubby got me a set of Corelle red and white plates with the intention of me getting rid of my ivy plate set.

This is where it gets interesting. Are you still with me? I loved the bowls with my new set but not so much the plates. I liked the size of the the plates of the ivy set for every day and I like the bowls of the ivy set for salads but not so much for cereal or soup. So what do you think happened? Yeah, I ended up keeping both sets.

Let me show you exhibit A. See all those plates? That’s both sets of Corelle dishes. Yes we do have guests over quite a bit but on a daily basis there is only 4 of us now.

Time passed and my hubby started inquiring about the Fiesta sets he had purchased me and I told him that I really needed 4 more sets to make it practical to use. So what did he do 2 Christmas’ ago? Yup, you guessed it, he bought me 4 more sets. I didn’t even bother washing them this time I just put them in my hutch and walked away.  For another 2 years. *hangs head in shame*

That is until today. Today I washed and dried every piece of Fiesta ware I owned and made room in my cupboard for them. We even used them today. I love them. Here’s the proof.

  

But I’m still having trouble letting any of the other plate sets go. Did I mention that each set came with matching coffee cups, so I have a total of 24 coffee mugs that I don’t use because I like to use my “special” coffee mugs.

I also have a silverware problem. He didn’t buy me 4 more sets of silverware to go with the other 4 sets of dishes. But we won’t go there.

It’s alright to laugh at me. I laugh at myself all the time. I’ve got issues people. Deep rooted plate associated issues.

Help me out here. What’s a gal to do?

The Pros and Cons of Getting Old!

About 2 years ago I wrote a post called “Getting Old Stinks”. It basically focused on the negatives of getting old. So while I was in my favorite thinking spot (the shower) I began to think about the pros and cons of getting old. There’s some good in getting old and I want to point them out.

• Pro: The hair on your legs becomes less and less and even tends to get softer as the years go by.
• Con: It relocates to your face in the form of a beard and moustache.

• Con: You you forget things.
• Pro: It frees up your schedule.

• Con: Your eyesight gets worse.
• Pro: A person always looks smarter while wearing glasses so use it to your advantage and say something profound.

• Con: You gain a little weight.
• Pro: Saves on the heating bill in the Winter.

• Pro: You might get grand kids.
• Con: You become unrecognizable to your own children. The words “Who are you and what have you done with my parents?” have come out of my mouth more than once since I’ve had children and my parents became grand-parents.

• Con: You tend to “leak” a little whenever you laugh, sneeze or cough.
• Pro: Depends now looks like real underwear. Good to know!

 

I hope you got a chuckle today. Please feel free to add your own pros and cons in the comment section. I’d love to hear them.

Have a lovely day my friends.

OXOX,

Kim

 

Welcome to Napkins R’ Us!

You know I thought it stopped at my candle problem. But as I was cleaning out some stuff I came across these.

Do you need some birthday napkins?

How about some Easter Napkins?

Thanksgiving? Sheesh!

Miscellaneous?

If you need me I’ll be on the phone with Napkinaholics Anonymous!

Have a nice day!

Our Zip-Lining Adventure!

If you were ever wondering whether or not to go zip-lining, I hope this persuades you to go. It was a blast. We couldn’t sit down or stand up without moaning for 3 days but it was worth it. I think..

My hubby was in charge of video taping so we didn’t get a lot of him on camera and since he went right before I did on everything, and since I was trying to load the shortest snippets available, there is a lot of me in the videos. I tried to load video of our BFF’s doing their thing but it just wasn’t cooperating this morning.

I do hope you enjoy me at my finest. It’s VERY flattering video. You probably won’t be able to tell I’m having a great time either. I hide it so well.

This particular zip-lining adventure was at our local zoo. So we got to see animals and zipline over alligators and everything. It just added to the excitement. And did I mention we did the advanced track because “we thought” since we were in such “great shape” that it would be cake? It wasn’t cake, let me just tell you that right now. No cakey!

What I loved about this track was that you were up in the trees 98% of the time. You had to do pretty difficult obstacles to get from one zipline to another. It was challenging but way cool at the same time.

 

 

 

Well I hope you enjoyed your little glimpse of zip-lining.

Have you ever gone and if so did you love it?

HAVE A ZIP-A -DEE–DO-DA DAY MY FRIENDS!

Eww, Seriously, So Gross!

I know we are all trying to lose a few pounds this year and we need all the help we can get. Thanks to an unlikely source, I believe I have found the perfect solution for all of us.

Enjoy!

Tell Me Again WHY I Have Throw Pillows?

In theory, I love throw pillows. You see them in magazines all nicely placed here and there as if they belong there and all is well in the world.

For some reason it just doesn’t work out so well in my world. 98.45% of the time MY throw pillows look like this.

 

Even I will move them out of the way just to sit down. Which brings me to this question that maybe you can answer.

Throw pillows are good for………

Throwing?

Squishing down into the seat?

Decorating the coffee table?

Using up the fabric and stuffing of the world?

Setting your food on?

I personally use one of them to put under my knees when I’m working out and have to do push-ups. Yeah, that’s why I made them. OY!

Help a girl out. Tell me why throw pillows exist. Because in my house it isn’t for decoration. *sigh*

HAVE A LOVELY DAY MY FRIENDS!

Help!

Do you really want to know what goes on here at the homestead? Do you? Do you? I’m warning you, sometimes it ain’t pretty.

First let me start off by saying, I love music. I’m one of those walking radio stations and you know how radio stations will wear a song out. That’s me, right now. For 3 days straight I’ve been singing this song, A LOT!

You HAVE to listen to it to see what I’m talking about. It’s addicting. It’s catchy. It’s completely senseless, which makes for a great song to get stuck in your head for days on end.

The wildfire is spreading and I can’t stop it. My kids are singing it and now even my husband is singing it (which is funny in it’s own right). It gives no warning, it just starts and stops at any given moment.

I need intervention people!

This post is brought to you by a homesteader who needs to spend more time out in the garden.

Speaking of garden, I’ll have a garden update very soon.

HAVE A LOVELY DAY MY FRIENDS!

Because Sometimes I’ve Just Got to Mess With Your Mind!

Let me know if you found it and how long it took.

You’re Welcome!

A Giggle For Your Day!

The Dreaded Senior Moment!

Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down.  I was looking for my keys.  They were not in my pockets.  A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.
Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the pick-up.  Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.  My wife, Mable, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.  My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them.  Her theory is that the car will be stolen.  As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion.  Her theory was right.  The parking lot was empty.
I immediately called the police.  I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the pick-up, and that it had been stolen.  Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered.  I always call her “Honey” in times like these.  “I left my keys in the pick-up, and it has been stolen.”
There was a period of silence.  I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Mable’s voice. “J.B.” she barked, “I dropped you off!”  Now it was my time to be silent.  Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.”  Mable retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your pick-up!”

 

Have a fabulous day my friends!

I Use My Kids as a Cover Up!

One of these days I may become an adult that enjoys sitting and watching the news, reading the newspaper, keeping up with current events. But not today and probably not tomorrow.

When the showers are done and it’s time to settle down for the night I don’t turn on the news or (insert popular night time drama here) no, we watch shows like this.

This show cracks me up. Some how it feeds on my “keen” sense of humor and I find myself laughing at every episode (and secretly wanting a pet platypus).

With our newly acquired Netflix for the Wifi we’ve managed to watch almost all 78 episodes in about 2 months. Yeeup!

Then there’s this one.

This show feeds on the fact that deep down I may have wanted to be a scientist or maybe just a genius. But I usually end up feeling like Carl, the chubby fella on the right with glasses who doesn’t know what’s going on half the time but as long as he’s got food he’s up for anything.

I’m not sure how I’m going to explain this kind of behavior when the kids are grown and gone but for now, my kids are my cover up. Shhhh!

This post brought to you by parents who just want to be a Toys R’ Us kid.

Have a FUNTASTIC day my friends!

The Gingerbread House Results are In! You have spoken!

But I think I’ll recap the night first.

As always there is LOTS of candy. And you’ll be happy to know that I didn’t eat one morsel.

We all started with gingerbread kits. It just makes life a “little'” easier.

Once again our BFF’s joined us in the fun. And I’d say Mr. Mike brought some of the fun with him. LOL!

 

Yup! He pretty much had us in stitches.

But then we had to get down to “serious” business and start decorating and building our homes.

 

Our BFF’s busy decorating.

  

Here are their finished houses. I didn’t want to post them on the original post and get everyone confused. But they are definitely worth showing.

Everyone was very hard at work. Even Stormie! She made it her job to recycle the cardboard boxes.  Good girl!

 

But in the end a fun time was had by all and we proudly displayed our houses. Can you spot your favorite and who built it?

 

Well I’m proud to say that my daughter FINALLY won a competition and she was EXTREMELY happy about it. Way to go precious!

 

I’ll leave you with this!

Have a FANTABULOUS day my friends and thank you to all who voted!

HUGS!

If for some reason you didn’t see the voting post with all the houses on it, go here to check it out.

One of these days….

 

….my brain will catch up with my body and realize that I’m not a spring chicken any more and quit talking me into doing things I shouldn’t be, like say, push ups.  They’re evil.

….I’m going to finish what I started in the same exact day.

….I will know exactly what day it is without any help from my 9 year old.

…..I won’t stare blankly at my blog and actually have something useful to tell you.

….I won’t act surprised when the dentist calls to remind me of my appointment that I made 6 months prior.

…..I’ll complete a whole thought in one sitting.

…..I’ll be able to remember why I entered a room and not have to back track to the original room to see if something triggers the original intent.

……that prior sentence will make sense to me.

…..but probably not today!

HAVE A LOVELY DAY MY FRIENDS!

Fall Decorating or Scarecrow Convention!

This is sad.

I need intervention.

I need inspiration.

I need to get a clue.

I need to think about how this happened.

I need to say no to the crow.

I need to bury my head in shame.

I need to repent of my Fall decor envy.

I need to hit the after Fall sales ASAP, so this won’t happen again next year.

I need you to hold my hand and tell me it’s going to be alright, despite my decorating faux pas.

The good news? I do not have a crow problem in my home.

HAVE A FABULOUS DAY MY FRIENDS!